Because of my recent status change from employed to unemployed people keep asking me what my plans for the future are. Well right now I have some pretty lofty goals . First I am going to form a play group for "normal" moms. The rules of the group will be first and foremost you can not be a Supermom. You can not look like you and your child just came off the pages of a Gap ad. Second, your home has to be dirty. Not the dirty where you have piles of newspapers and millions of animals with millions of piles of crap. Not the kind of dirt that will require you to join a support group for horders, but at least a few crumbs and toys out of place. Third you can not use your oven more then twice a week. The rest of the time your meals must come out of a box and/or be microwaved. Third you better be able to use a real swear word if something really goes wrong; none of this what the flip crap. Last and not least, you must be insecure in your parenting choices and constantly worried that in some way you are destroying your child's life.
So far the play group has only one member so it has been pretty easy to plan outings. So that goal is going pretty well.
My second goal is to come up with something worth writing a blog about. I can always write/brag about my perfect gorgeous little boy and what a genius he is despite my parenting, but that just seems a little rude. Don't get me wrong - I will still do that but I need to find something interesting that I have done.
I have been reading my friends blogs and feeling, well, like a big old slacker. My one friend's blog has beautiful patterns that she has created that I could only dream of being able to come up with. My other friend has stories of the fun things her and her family do. And when she isn't just being an awesome mom she is training for triathlons. Yet another friend has a hilarous blog that shows her genius children and her beautiful self having oodles of fun in her spare time while she works on her PhD. Yep Mama's keeping up... just friday I finished a book and watched TMZ. BUSY, BUSY.
Speaking of my book. I finally finished the last book in the Twilight Saga. I can now enter rehab and hopefully one day return to normal. Of course to return to normal I would have had to be normal in the first place. I got Breaking Dawn on Wednesday at 3pm and I finished it Friday at 1pm. Being that it is a 756 page book you can imagine that I have been very productive this week. Instead of telling Griff to run and play while Mama watches her programs I had to tell him to play quietly while Mama studied :) That is my kind of homework. I think I could see myself go back to school if I could come up with a Masters Degree in TV and Romance Novels.
So those are the plans for this unemployed productive member of society.
5 comments:
Ohh, can I join, oh can I please.
Hi, this is Stephanie (Doug's wife) and I think I meet all your requirements for the play group, can I please join? You make me laugh! Enjoy being unemployed and productive!
Can I join the club, too? :) I loved this post - you are too funny! I need to talk to you about Breaking Dawn - what did you think? I still have mixed feelings, but the more I think about it, the more I like how it all ended (except for the baby names. What kind of name is Renesme?)
Wow I didn't think I could find anyone to join! We now have 4 memembers though I think you guys don't fit some of the rules because you are all just too awesome:)
I am totally up for the play group! I think all mom's feel this way most of the time (about totally screwing up their kids) so the group may get bigger than you can handle! Although, I do love the additional prerequisites that we have dirty homes (check) and never cook (check). My lack of homemaking skills are finally coming in handy. Thanks, Steph for finding my true potential!
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