I Was a Much Better Mom, Before I Had a Child

I think I was a much better mother before I had a kid. It seemed so simple. You just teach them whats right and then everything is perfect, right. Uhm nope. They come packaged with personalities, tempers, and that pesky free agency. Granted at 3 my child isn't really exploring much of his free agency...yet. I was thinking about the difference between the theory of child rearing and the actual application. See in theory I was never going to yell at my child because I wouldn't want to lower his self esteem. In theory I was only going to serve him healthy food and avoid that evil fast food and junk food trap. In theory I was never going to use TV or DVDs to distract my child. I was going to take ever opportunity to teach him all the things he needs to know to be a happy well adjusted child. In theory I was going to be patient and peaceful and be the mother equivilant of Budda.

In practice some days are full of McDonalds, PBS and Nick Jr., and me trying not to lose that last shred of sanity I cling to. And yep there is yelling. Often you will hear such phrases as, stop jumping on that, don't touch that, Argh stop climbing on me, get that out of your mouth, and stop putting your feet on my head. Yep theory and practice are two very different things.

I was thinking about the difference between the great mother I was as a childless woman and the adequate to below average mother I am now. At my child's gym the other day this woman had brought her niece to my son's class. It seemed no matter where little G and I went she was right there telling me what I should be doing with my son. Actually most of the time she didn't even seem to notice me she just followed Griff around telling him what he was doing wrong and what he should be doing. I have to admit that it took everything I had not the knock the witch out. But I still believe hitting others in front of your child isn't the best way to teach them to be kind. Luckily that theory stuck because I would have liked practicing some kick boxing on her *ss.

In the short amount of time I have been a mother I have been surprised by how many people are willing to share their opinions on how you should raise your child. From strangers at the store to well intentioned women at church or even preschool teachers I have been given ample advice as to how to raise my son. Funny thing is when I ask friends that I admire or family I usually get something along the lines of I don't know, I guess you just do the best that you can do.

So that is my rant of the day. Basically opinions are like butt holes and I don't want to smell strangers butt holes.